The story of how Michelangelo formed David out of flawed marble is a beautiful picture of how God forms leaders out of flawed lives. What is your story? Are you aware of how God is forming you? More importantly, are you engaged with Him as He is forming you even now? Forming Davids for the 21st Century is intended to involve you even more fully in the leader formation process.
The opening paragraph in each chapter of this study guide will introduce the main ideas covered in the corresponding video segment. Then as you watch the video, jot down notes in the spaces provided. After each episode, use your notes and the questions provided to reflect further on how the thoughts from the video apply to your life. Though this series will certainly be beneficial if you complete it by yourself, we highly recommend going through it in a small group setting. There is incomparable worth in being transparent with others in the leader formation pilgrimage.
May God bless you as you become more aware and engaged in the story of God’s formation of you as His leader for the 21st Century.
What do Moses, Gideon, David, and Peter all have in common?
Great faith? Great gifts? Great leadership?
Great flaws. Scripture graciously walks us through the lives of leaders without the stained glass of success. We see them question the Living God in a burning bush. We see them doubt multiple miracles. We watch them gaze on the rooftop as a beautiful woman bathes. We cringe when they co
What do Moses, Gideon, David, and Peter all have in common?
Great faith? Great gifts? Great leadership?
Great flaws. Scripture graciously walks us through the lives of leaders without the stained glass of success. We see them question the Living God in a burning bush. We see them doubt multiple miracles. We watch them gaze on the rooftop as a beautiful woman bathes. We cringe when they cowl before an accusing servant girl. Captured on the eternal pages of God’s word, we see their flaws, and quite possibly, we catch a glimpse of ourselves. In a day of countless leadership seminars, books, e-tips, and gurus, we tend to believe that as long as we apply proven principles of leadership, we can form a following. Our culture displays the “winners” and beckons us to practice their maxims and techniques. Though helpful, principles, maxims, and techniques can only teach the how of leadership. It falls woefully short on teaching us the who of leadership. But who a leader is determines how a leader acts. The how only speaks to the hands of a leader – the who speaks to the heart. This isn’t another series on leadership principles, though you will learn a few. This isn’t a series on the maxims and techniques of great leaders, though you will see a few. Rather this series is about how God wants to form the heart of a leader, specifically, your heart as a leader. And He must start with your flaws. We will see that God is in the business of forming leaders. First we will journey back in time to sit with another “creator.” Listen to learn what trained hands could do with flawed marble.
Brokenness: God’s demand that we face ourselves in ways we never would so we can become ourselves in ways we never could.
And remember – it’s not about leadership, it’s about the heart of the leader.
Leadership is not about power or control or success.
Leadership is about love… A love so determined
it will break us to make us whole.
1. In the video we saw flawed marble compared to flawed leaders. Think back to a time when God broke you in order to shape you as a leader. What insights have you had about yourself?
2. What leaders have impacted you the most in your life? Was it their skills that attracted you or their character and heart? How were those leaders shaped by their brokenness?
3. Let’s get real for a moment. How do we as leaders end up using God as our agent for our power, our control, and our success?
4. We learned that who a leader is is far more important than what a leader does. Do you agree or disagree? How do we communicate this to leaders who wish to separate their public life from their personal life?
5. How do you see the difference between leadership development and leader formation?
Rather than being developed like computer chips through a mechanized process, leaders are formed by the creative hands of God. Much like a sculptor with a flawed piece of marble, God personally transforms leaders from flawed lives into whole beings. From the very beginning of our lives, God has been sculpting us into His servants.
Take a few moments this week to meditate on these Scripture passages.
Did you catch the common word?
What does the term “form” convey to you about God’s involvement with Adam, Israel, and Jeremiah?
What does the picture of God forming Adam from dirt reveal about how God creates?
God is clearly involved in the dirty and messy process of forming humanity, His children Israel, and His chosen servants. He, like a potter, shapes the clay to His specifications. In the same way, God forms you. And what He forms, He owns.
As you look back across your life, how has God been forming you?
What does the fact that God owns you as a leader mean to you?
But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are the work of your hand.
– Isaiah 64:8
How many times have you thought:
How many times has God asked you to do a task, a mission, or a job that pushes you outside of your expertise, confidence, or desire?
If this has happened to you, then you are in good company.
God’s l
How many times have you thought:
How many times has God asked you to do a task, a mission, or a job that pushes you outside of your expertise, confidence, or desire?
If this has happened to you, then you are in good company.
God’s leaders are not so much defined by their strengths as by their weaknesses. He picks the feeble to battle the formidable.
Jesus is calling empty-handed men and women
to feed five thousand. This is what His
kind of leadership is all about
He taps the woefully inadequate to lead incredibly significant ventures. Would you pick a murdering insecure stutterer to take on the ruling empire? Would you pick a fearful farm boy who needs multiple miracles to lead an outgunned and outnumbered army? Would you roll the dice with a shepherd boy and a sling? Before they became enduring leadership masterpieces, God chipped away at the hearts of flawed marble in Moses, Gideon, and David.
Biblical leadership must start with an admission – “I don’t have what it takes.” We are going to go on a journey through the middle part of Mark as we look at the only miracle recorded in all four gospels. Through this paradigm miracle as well as four other message miracles, you will discover why God calls us as leaders to step out when we want to shrink back. In addition, listen for the struggle that threatens to deafen, cripple, blind, and paralyze you as a leader.
A hardened heart deafens the ears, cripples the tongue,
blinds the eyes, and paralyzes the hands.
1. Jesus expected Peter to get out of the boat. Is there a specific action Jesus is expecting you to do that will get your feet wet? Are you actively putting yourself in a position of dependence so you can do things you could never do otherwise? If not, why not?
2. Think about the opportunities the disciples missed because they didn’t hear Jesus with an open heart. Have you missed chances to step out of the boat? What kept you from trusting Jesus?
3. How have you seen the principle that “knowledge can easily get in the way of trust” operate in your life? How does it affect your leadership?
4. Where do you hope (and fear) God takes you in the future? What causes you to have this fear? How would your movement into that feared place benefit the body of Christ?
5. What do you think the Dreaded L.D. might be?
Where are you in your leader formation process? Do you find that far too often you are shrinking in the storm rather than stepping out on the waves? Take a few moments to look down at the words listed below. Select the terms that most accurately describe your feelings about God and your current leadership pilgrimage.
Peaceful |
Angry |
Close |
Hopeful |
Afraid |
Impatient |
Hurt |
Trapped |
Stressed |
Uncertain |
Let down |
Resentful |
Joyous |
Distant |
Tired |
Longing |
Loved |
Confused |
Released |
Disappointed |
Summarize each feeling you chose with a short statement – one or two sentences – explaining why you feel the way you do.
Based on these responses, how healthy would you say your current relationship with God is? What steps must you take to move your relationship with Him to a place of greater trust and health?
Where do you hope (and fear) God takes you in the future? What contribution would this new direction make to your formation? How would these hopes and fears benefit the body of Christ?
What might cause you not to trust God for His next step for you in your leader formation process? How must you respond to trust God for this next step? What if His next step is just another step on the same treadmill you are on now? How will you respond?
Remember, God’s primary concern for you is your growth, not your success. As a leader, you must remember His goal is to see Christ formed in you, regardless of the cost.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through the fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.
– Isaiah 43:2-3
What’s the gas in your leadership tank?
In other words, what drives you as a leader?
You can choose from an array of octanes. For many it’s the illusion of control, to be master of their ship. For others, it’s the pursuit of a platform, to hear the applause of followers. Some simply want to make peace, to insure that everyone is happy. Still others know it can be done better and their quest for perfection fuels their engin
What’s the gas in your leadership tank?
In other words, what drives you as a leader?
You can choose from an array of octanes. For many it’s the illusion of control, to be master of their ship. For others, it’s the pursuit of a platform, to hear the applause of followers. Some simply want to make peace, to insure that everyone is happy. Still others know it can be done better and their quest for perfection fuels their engine. If we are honest, whether we lead a Fortune 500 company, a 500-member church, or a 5-member small group, we tend to be driven by something other than self-sacrifice.
Most of us are driven by a desire for mixed glory: God’s and ours. We tell people we desperately want to advance His kingdom, yet we don’t mind if some of our expectations get met along the way. Over time our expectations turn into demands, and when God appears to fall short in meeting our demands, depression becomes a familiar companion. We start thinking: “I should be far more successful than I am now.” “After all these years of following Christ, I think I’m due.” “Others seem to have it all, why can’t I?”
But the single greatest question of a leader’s life ought to be “Whose kingdom am I really advancing?” And if we don’t probe deeply enough, we’ll continue to be driven by our demands for power, performance, peace, and perfection. We make the mistake of believing Christian leaders are. immune from such drivenness. As we will see, those closest to Jesus end up demanding the most from Him.
Caesar was deified Jesus was crucified. Guess who’s Lord today.
Come to the steppes of Caesarea Philippi where we catch up with a conversation already in progress. Put yourself in Peter’s sandals as Jesus probes him. In the end, you will be left with a clear choice. Ultimately your answer will determine what really drives you.
Which do you do? Say “yes” to self and take up your crown daily? Or say “no” to self and take up your cross daily?
Say no to the demands of self. Say no to those expectations
that drive you to be in control of life. Say no to your kingdom
and crown. Your expectations have become your demands.
1. Answer the question, “Do you really want to come after Jesus?”
We will look at where that ultimately leads in the next session, but after this lesson, is there a hesitancy to follow after the cross? Can you imagine letting go of some core expectations and reframing your established knowledge?
2. When you think about what drives you as a leader, are you more tempted by power, performance, peace, or perfection? How does this effect the way you lead?
3. Think about how we, as Christians, can fall into the trap of saying “Jesus is my Savior, but I’ll manage my career.” Have you had difficulties integrating the reality of the cross in your leadership? Do you, like Peter, want success without the cross?
4. Have you ever expected the Lord to bring success to you, but you’ve reached the point where you weren’t as successful as you thought you should be? How did you feel when you reached that point? What are some reasons why we as leaders struggle with this expectation?
5. Of the eight core expectations, circle the one that you dwell on the most. What do you expect Jesus to grant you as a Christian? A mate? Children? A fair shake? Control over your reality?
How is this revealed in the way you lead?
Few things dominate leaders more than the drive to succeed. We all desire power, dominion, and glory. So we tend to sacrifice everything on the altar of success – marriage, children, friends, rest, joy, and health. By the time many leaders are sixty, they have success, but they may be divorced, living in a marriage of convenience, the parents of angry children, alone, or physically hurting. This is the fruit of drivenness.
We saw Peter in this session as a man who was dedicated to Christ, but also driven by a crown. In Mark 8:27-33 we discovered a commendation for his dedication and virtually in the same breath a rebuke for his drivenness. We should take warning when our pursuit of God’s glory becomes contaminated by a drive for our own glory.
How can we discern where we stand in this struggle? Peter thought he was doing the right thing by pulling Jesus aside. He needed a rebuke from someone who saw what was really going on in him. We need others to help us see what blinds us.
Ask a mentor, your mate, a very close friend, and a younger associate (someone younger than you, but who has great insight into you) the following questions:
1. How do you see me hurting myself in my drivenness to succeed?
2. How do you see me hurting others in my drivenness for success?
3. What needs am I trying to meet through my drivenness? (power, performance, peace, perfection)
4. How do you see me serving as well as striving for success?
5. What word do you have for me that will help me in this struggle for success?
6. What price am I paying because of my pursuit of success?
7. What other question(s) should I be asking you about my drivenness for success?
Now take some time to journal their answers on the following page. Ask God for insight about your drivenness and core expectations. Go to the cross. Seek freedom from the need for glory, dominion, and power.
Just remember: We follow the One who carried a cross on His back. That’s what defines our leadership.
For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.
– Mark 10:45
Imagine the marble turning to Michelangelo and saying, “My arms aren’t shaped the way I like. I’d rather you give me a smaller nose. I’d prefer to wear some clothes. “The sculptor never debates with the marble about what he’s doing. It’s absurd to imagine the marble arguing with Michelangelo about the shape it is being given.
Whether we are talking about stone, canvas, or clay, artists have the right to design whatever they desire from th
Imagine the marble turning to Michelangelo and saying, “My arms aren’t shaped the way I like. I’d rather you give me a smaller nose. I’d prefer to wear some clothes. “The sculptor never debates with the marble about what he’s doing. It’s absurd to imagine the marble arguing with Michelangelo about the shape it is being given.
Whether we are talking about stone, canvas, or clay, artists have the right to design whatever they desire from their materials. Clay pots are a common metaphor throughout Scripture. The prophets chastised Israel for quarreling with the Potter over how He crafted them. Paul picks up this theme when he writes to the Romans, “But who are you, O man, to answer back to God? Will what is molded say to its molder, ‘Why have you made me like this?’ Has the potter no right over the clay, to make out of the same lump one vessel for honored use and another for dishonorable use?” (Romans 9:20-21).
Yet we as leaders tend to trust our intuition over God’s direction. So, when we aren’t being formed the way we believe we ought to be – our position doesn’t quite have the prestige we think we deserve, the accolades aren’t arriving as we anticipated they would, our best laid plans fall apart, a job we want goes to a peer – we begin to feel that God isn’t looking out for our best interests. That’s when we fall captive to our own blind self-confidence. In short, we try to become both the potter and the clay. We want to call the shots on how we should be made and used.
Of course marble, canvas, and clay are inanimate objects, but Paul uses the picture of the clay pot to show us that we need to trust the God who created us so He can form us into His kind of leaders. Our responsibility is to trust rather than complain. In this session, we look at how we seek to wrestle control from God. Then we see the four symptoms of the Dreaded Leader’s Disease. By the end of the teaching time, we will stand in the tomb of Jesus and ask the question, “Can you trust the Artist with your life?”
Why are we competitive? Why are we striving for power?
Because there’s something in our hearts that’s missing,
something that we seek to fill by overcoming others so we can feel superior
to them. We think that’s leadership.
“They went out and fled from the tomb, for trembling and astonishment had gripped them.”
- Mark 16:8
We follow the man who calls us to carry
the cross on our backs to the tomb.
That’s leadership for us.
1. Were you one of the ones protesting that you did not have a hardened heart? That you have done everything you can to please God? How do you respond to the call of the cross?
2. Of the three ways that we try to become God – determine our reality, define our identity, or decide our security – which one do you struggle with the most and why?
3. We looked at four symptoms of the Dreaded Leader’s Disease.
A. Destructive Competition
B. Power Plays
C. Insensitivity
D. Blind Self-Confidence
Try and define each in your own words. Then describe how each symptom impacts your life. Apply this question to yourself, “Why do you struggle with these symptoms?”
4. Do you remember those core expectations from the earlier lesson? Have you taken them into the tomb and left them there?
5. Are you laying in the grave right now? Will you give up all control and trust Jesus to raise you from the dead? Will you say “yes” to the grave?
In the Old Testament, “form” is the root of the word “potter.” God prepares us as His clay, places us on the wheel, and gradually shapes us into the vessel of His choosing. God is intensely involved in forming us for an eternity of service.
What does it mean to you to have God as the Potter in your life? What does it mean that He is forming you into the kind of clay pot He wants you to be?
Have you ever had feelings of dissatisfaction because of the type of clay pot God is forming you to be? Do you ever feel like you’re a water pot when you would really like to be a decorative urn or a Ming vase? What impact do these feelings have on you personally? On your marriage and parenting? On your leadership?
Paul calls us clay pots – merely baked dirt – in 2 Corinthians 4:7.
We’d prefer to be a precious piece of ceramic, even a beautiful umbrella stand in some grand entry hall. But not a water pot, and, God forbid, never a chamber pot.
So in our disgust we, the clay, decide to become the potter and make ourselves something nobler. We want to make God’s hands our hands and wrestle control away from the Potter. We seek to determine our reality, define our identity, and decide our security. Whether it’s through money, image management, safety, or superiority, when we try to put ourselves in ultimate control, we’ve fallen into idolatry. Only God can determine reality. And God has already defined our identity. Most of all, God alone is our security. So, we strive foolishly to become the Potter and in the end we create idols and turn ourselves into worthless heaps of useless clay.
But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hardpressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
– 2 Corinthians 4:7-9
“When I grow up I want to go into middle management.”
“I pray God will allow me to have a church with average growth.”
“I just can’t wait to go to the Olympics and win bronze.”
If you are a leader, you are not driven to be mediocre. Certainly an Olympic bronze is far from a slap in the face, but great athletes don’t enter races to finish third. The same is true with leaders in any area; th
“When I grow up I want to go into middle management.”
“I pray God will allow me to have a church with average growth.”
“I just can’t wait to go to the Olympics and win bronze.”
If you are a leader, you are not driven to be mediocre. Certainly an Olympic bronze is far from a slap in the face, but great athletes don’t enter races to finish third. The same is true with leaders in any area; there is a drive to be recognized, noticed. In a word it is the drive to be great. The book that swept off the shelves in leadership circles was titled, Good to Great – not Good to Decent or Good to Acceptable. It was Good to Great.
The disciples were no different. After a few years of walking with Jesus, they too began jockeying for position. They didn’t spend time debating about who would finish last or in the middle of the pack. They argued over who was “the greatest.” While Jesus never chastised their passions, He did change their perceptions. Certainly there was a path to greatness, but one few traveled. The path to greatness is truly the road less traveled.
Scripture defines this paradoxical path. Greatness comes through weakness, to be first we must be last, to be the most we must become the least. The leader must become the servant of all.
And so we, as supposedly sophisticated and wise leaders, act like “servants.” We spend time taking out the trash, serving coffee at the women’s ministry event, or arriving at staff meetings with bagels and cream cheese.
While those are all great gestures, they don’t quite capture the greatness of servanthood demanded by Jesus as discussed in Mark 10:45. We start by seeing the dramatic difference between servants and slaves and then we will discover how our forefinger and thumb reveal all we need to know about leadership.
DOULOS
The greatest thing you can do is be used by God
to form leaders, but it takes a slave leader to do it.
Purpose
Destiny
Accountability
Many leaders are building a skyscraper on the foundation of a chicken coop.
1. Remember, “You are not just a blip on the screen of time.” Do you believe you have a specific destiny? If so, have you shared it with anyone? Are you fearful to share it?
2. Note the leader’s PDA: Purpose, Destiny, Accountability.
Which one do you need to shore up and why?
3. Leadership tends to be about accomplishing important tasks: plans, organization, measurements, evaluation. So why did John take so much time in his gospel to describe slave leadership? Who has modeled this for you in your life? When was the last time you acted as a slave leader?
4. Why are we so driven as leaders to develop our competence but avoid dealing with our character? What are the signs of a closed-handed leader? How can one move to being more of an open-handed leader?
5. God tends to put pressure on the heart of leaders between the ages of thirty-five and forty-five. Why do you think He does this? Have you experienced that pressure?
Sometimes leaders are driven to develop competences at the risk of character because we idolize something other than our God. To what do you give your attention more than God? Your time? Your money? Your devotion? Your heart? Whatever you give your heart to is your idol – your god.
What idols do you have in your life?
What do you struggle to release to God? This is an idol in your life.
You can easily come up with the usual suspects: money, sex, power, success, recognition, influence – but control lies at the root of every such list. Control is the ultimate in idolatry because control puts us in charge and makes us accountable to no one but ourselves. Control lies at the core of pride, the vain idea that we can make it in life without God. So here are the questions you must answer:
What keeps you from throwing those idols into the fire and trusting God exclusively for security and meaning? Fear? Pride? Pleasure? What keeps you from trusting God? Are your idols worth the loss of everything that matters to you?
There is a very basic reality that all of us must understand. Once we release our control of life to God we gain genuine control of life through God. Our control is an illusion. Name one thing that really matters that you can control. As long as you think you’re in control, you’re out of control. But as soon as you relinquish control to God, you’ll find control of your life as you never have before.
His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.
– 2 Peter 1:3-4
How we sculpt great leaders shows what we prize in them. As you stroll through the grass of any grand battlefield you meet the memories of generals who were daring, indomitable, and courageous. When you meander through piazzas in Europe you see the statues of kings and statesmen etched with resolve, passion, and determination. Whether it’s Winston Churchill standing undaunted or General Jackson mounted on his regal steed, we sculpt w
How we sculpt great leaders shows what we prize in them. As you stroll through the grass of any grand battlefield you meet the memories of generals who were daring, indomitable, and courageous. When you meander through piazzas in Europe you see the statues of kings and statesmen etched with resolve, passion, and determination. Whether it’s Winston Churchill standing undaunted or General Jackson mounted on his regal steed, we sculpt what we esteem.
Certainly leaders need to have resolve, passion, and courage. We follow leaders who tower in the midst of battles and forget those who cower in the storm. But do those traits define the essence of a great leader?
If you were to walk across a seminary courtyard in Dallas, Texas you would discover a very different statue. Like the others, it is handcrafted from precious materials. Like the others, an artist sculpted what he valued. However you will discover from the subject’s position a far different message.
He kneels on bended knees with nothing but a slave’s towel covering his waist. With head bowed, he is focused on a basin. His hands hold neither sword nor scepter, but a foot and a towel. Before Him you see the startled figure of Peter – tense, resistant, confused.
When Jesus wrapped Himself in the slave’s towel He changed the world and the way we should view leadership. In this session, we will see why Jesus’ position in John 13 is the essence of true leadership. Furthermore, we will see why the pictures we have in our minds of what a “slave-leader” looks like are all wrong. He will show us through Jesus’ actions in the upper room why slave-leadership looks nothing like the senior pastor serving coffee at the church dinner. By the end of this session, we believe you will begin sculpting a whole new statue of your leadership. We all want–to be the undaunted, passionate, and. determined leader but are we willing to join the Order of the Towel first?
Some of the greatest authority you will ever exercise
as a leader you will exercise on your knees –
and I am not talking about prayer.
As a slave-leader you have five choices. You can become a:
There is only one way we become slave
leaders – through the Slave Leader.
1. What struck you most about this final session? How do you understand the fact that “slave leadership is not about doing what our followers want us to do?”
2. We focused a great deal on bringing followers onto God’s agenda despite the costs that may be involved (marred reputations, negative remarks, friendships, social image). What cost is difficult for you to pay when you think about being a slave to your followers?
3. How do we as leaders isolate ourselves? How do we attempt to freeze people out when the cost gets too high to truly help them follow God’s agenda?
4. Of the five choices that Bill listed, which slave do you find yourself becoming: a slave to your followers, a slave to your peers, a slave to your leader, a slave to yourself, or a slave to your Lord?
5. As you look back over the previous five sessions, which principles has God used to chisel and craft your heart? What steps are you going to implement as a result of this insight into leader formation?
The statues of the world’s great leaders all exude a sense of power. Only the image of Jesus in John 13 reveals the essence of true Christian leadership. Of the three leader-destroyers – money, sex, and power – power seems to be the one that impacts Christian leaders the most. Money and sex take their toll, but power seduces even the most mature Christian leaders.
We wrestle with power because it gives us an identity. It makes us feel like we’re somebody, like we matter, like we’re – well, like we’re God. We decide who matters and who doesn’t, who moves up and who moves down, who stays and who goes. Many of these decisions have life-changing consequences and some may even be matters of life or death. But a distinction must be made between personal power and appropriate authority, often called social power. Social power, in contrast to personal power, is exercised for the good of the vision and the group rather than the good of the leader. The difference between the two lies in motives. The same action maybe right or wrong, constructive or destructive, depending on why it is done. Here are two key questions to help identify our motives:
At times our personal interests and the interests of the group overlap, but many leaders abuse power because they feel threatened by followers. This misuse of power undermines our accountability before God who entrusted us with this vision and purpose.
So are you a power player? One of the things power players do is take over for God by acting to form their followers in their image. Are you a god working to form yourself and your followers according to your image? Take the power test below. Then give it to some key people in your life: mate or roommate, mature children, your manager, a few of your peers, those who report to you.
Five (5) is the highest number on this scale and one (1) is the lowest.
Nobody’s perfect, of course, but score much less than 90 on this scale and you need to note the critical areas. Anything under 80 may well indicate that you are seriously power driven. If you realize you have stepped into God’s formative role, you need to resign as God because you—like the rest of us—are not very good at that. Sign the letter below and give up trying to be God. Otherwise the best you can do is fail and the worst you will do is destroy others. So here’s what I suggest.Write the letter you see on this page. Date it, sign it, and keep it where you will see it frequently, say on your desk or in your Bible. Review it regularly so you make sure that God (and not you!) is God in your life and that you are becoming who He wants you to be.
This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this that someone lays down his life for his friends.
– John 15:12-13